Hello new mommies! (Yup, I've decided mamas who've already had their "new" experience with their babes already know what to expect. For me, as I journeyed through this new word "mommyhood" aka being a supermom, I learned a few valuable things that I wish I'd known before I'd taken on this new role/life. Of course, to each their own as I'm sure there are a million other things that there are to know that I can't possibly list them all here. But, here's what stuck out for me. Anyway, as you know, I'll be doing different blog posts for different lists. So, here goes the "What I wish I knew" list...
Top 5 What I Wish I Knew:
5) Schedule, schedule, schedule - you can do it! One of the best things we did for ourselves was to try our hardest to get Kai on a schedule. At first, the task seemed daunting and I totally wanted to give up at times. But, with my hubby's help, we stuck to it and #boom our son is on a 4-hour eating schedule, gets up at 7am every day (except for days Mommy and Daddy want to sleep in), and goes to bed around the same time daily. Find a time every day that you can commit to and just do that one thing where you wake up the baby at the same time. And if that's the only thing you do to get on a schedule (at first), then that in itself is a reason to celebrate. That's where we started and look at us now.
4) You will sleep again! Remember, you are the master. Ok, I know that sounds funny. I, too, laughed when the doctor told us that at our four month appointment that we had to be the master (not Kai). I was like, "No way, Kai tells me what he wants and we go with that." Also, I had been telling my hubby that I refused to let him cry it out, so I was willing to struggle through every day because of lack of sleep. But, thank goodness for my awesome hubby who helped us get to eleven to twelve hours of peace and quiet. #nojoke In short, this is how it went...we stuck to the 7am wake up to start. And we also weaned off the night feedings, I mean, my hubby helped us wean off the night feedings - let's be honest, I was willing to breastfeed the little monster as soon as I heard him cry at any moment. But, my hubby was in the driver's seat and said, "I'll call you downstairs if I think he needs it. Don't worry." So, I would sit upstairs and wait. But, slowly but surely, we started to have evenings all to ourselves. Honestly, it's lovely, we sleep all night, no night feedings (and my boobs have adjusted well #TMI), and we have a happy baby in the morning! Long gone are the days of weariness and my hubby and I doing/saying the strangest things (Me: Get the baby! *Hubby looks frantically under the blankets* Me: No, silly, in his bed!) - it's crazy what a lack of sleep does to you!
3) They can hear you! Sing! Talk about your day! I am the first to admit that when I first welcomed Kai into my life, I was like, "Boy, do I sound silly talking and singing to this human who just stares into lala-land." I had read in my parenting books that they hear you and you should talk about what you are doing. But, like a fish out of water, it just felt weird to be like, "Ok, now we are going to change your diaper...legs up." However, like magic, every time I changed him, I repeated that same phrase and after a while, he learned to raise his legs for me when I asked. #HowTheHeck.... Ok, how that happens or the science of it all, I don't know, but it's amazing. And when he started to recognize different songs and hand motions (hand motions are critical to the F-U-N), I knew I had to keep on doing it. Now, the crying can be soothed often with his favorite songs and works like a charm. It's hard for him to be angry when Mommy is singing and dancing to his favorite jams!
2) Burp cloths are EVERYTHING! When my hubby and I got burp cloths (a lot of burp cloths) for shower gifts, we were like, "Um, why do we need these things?!" And now, not gonna lie, we have tons of burp cloths and we are constantly shopping for more. We use them for burping (obviously!), spit ups, drool, poop protection, and whatever else necessary. #seriousface We use them in the car seat, in the baby carrier, in the bouncer, in the jumperoo, in his bed, etc...Sometimes it's difficult to wash the main fabric like from the car seat, so it's nice to just pull out the burp cloth and toss it in the laundry. Make life simpler and you'll learn to L-O-V-E those silly square pieces of guaze.
1) Take care of yourself! Yes, I was scared of leaving the house for the first couple of months because of the pain and newness of it all. But, (if you're like me) there will be a time when you might build up a little cabin fever and feel the need to take some "me" time. So take some time, go get a pedi or a massage, hang out with friends, or just make a run to the store. For me, especially, in the evening, I was ready to hang out all night (if needed) at Target, Ross', Longs, or Safeway. I didn't care really about buying anything in particular, I just enjoyed the freedom of walking around stroller-less and on my own. (Thanks to my hubby for allowing me that freedom.) I also want to suggest, accept help. If someone is offering you dinner, ACCEPT it. If someone is offering to come do some chores, ACCEPT it. If I could rewind time, I might trade in shower gifts from friends/family for the use of mealtrain.com - what a genius site. The main thing is the best thing you can do for your baby is to take care of YOU.
Runners-Up:
- Communicate, communicate, communicate. I can't stress it enough especially because the first few months of this new parenthood thing will be the toughest task you've ever encountered. Luckily, I have a great partner (my hubby) to explore this new adventure with. But, when times were tough, I told him what I needed. When I felt emotional (yup, hormones go cray cray!), he was my rock. Just keep communication lines open, ask for help from your partner, and be clear about what you are going through or what you need.
- Go to meetups, meetings, classes. Having mommy interaction time with other mommies did me good. Although I was a little gun shy about actually going to my first meetup, it was the best thing I could do for myself. I never felt more rejuvenated until after I met a few new mommies going through everything I was. I also enrolled Kai in My Gym classes - although not cheap, I've seen his fine motor/social skills develop, he has fun, and I get Mommy interaction time, too.
- Keep a feeding/diaper change log. Experienced mommies & daddies might laugh at me for this. I am not embarrassed at all. We are almost six months in and my hubby and I are proudly still doing a log. It's definitely helpful when we can't remember what boob to use (I know, I know, #TMI again), exact times our son ate, and how many wet and poopy diapers he had (very handy at doctor's appointments). Of course, to each their own, but currently it works for us and the log was a definite must to help us get Kai on his schedule.
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